Colleen's Journal Jar

Question #134 - Write about the time you left the nest, and the first time you moved far away from home.

2009-08-07T01:01:00.003-04:00

Well, I moved out of my parents' house on January 2, 1999. I moved allllllll the way down the street. A whole 11 houses down, whew! Big move, I know!! LOL! My parents bought the the 2 family home on the corner of the street I grew up on, and I've been living here for 10 years now. Of course, I was scared of moving here. Mostly scared about trying to pay almost all the bills myself! I was working at Headstart at the time, my second year there. So I actually did have enough to cover things, and to afford going out and stuff like that! When I had to quit my job a year later, I thought I'd have to move back in with my parents, but I figured out a couple things, and have been able to live here all this time.

I love being in my own apartment. A friend recently told me that a couple of our friends don't always like the loneliness of having their own place, but I can honestly say that I've never really felt lonely here. I have Mittens, which is nice. But if I want to talk to someone, I pick up the phone and call. I spend so much time online chatting with people, that it keeps me occupied, too. I just have so much freedom of doing my own thing in my own place, not having to worry about another person and their habits and such. This doesn't say much if I ever meet a decent guy one day and things start going well. LOL I don't know what I would be like living with another person again, but if that were ever to happen, I'd have to really adjust to not being alone!! But, I don't have such high hopes, so I'm not too worried!! lol

Question #133 - Write about feeling loved and by whom.

2009-02-23T17:09:00.003-05:00

I know that I am loved by my family, even when we don't always say it to each other. I'm trying to get better at that. I'm try to tell them I love them often, but a lot of times I forget. It's sometime I really need to work on!

I love my friends very much, but I don't say it enough to them, either. I'm going to hope that my friends love me, even though they don't say it either! lol

As far as being in love with someone, well that hasn't happened too often. I take that back. I have been in love with 2 men, but one of them, I knew in my heart didn't feel the same way about me. That ended up really hurting me in the end, but I also learned a lot from it at the same time. Last year, I thought I was falling in love again, and it was exciting because he was feeling the same way. Unfortunately, that just didn't end up working out in the end.

I'm not sure I just really answered the question. lol I do know that many people love and care for me in my life, even if it's not said in so many words. And that makes me feel happy, and good about myself. There must be something people see in me that makes them care for me a lot! Even if they aren't saying so. :)

Question #132 - Write about something you are grateful for.

2009-01-17T23:46:00.002-05:00

There are so many things I am grateful for in my life. Living with an unpredictable disease can do that to some people. The little things in life seem to matter most every day. I think what I am grateful for most are the people in my life. My family means the world to me, and they always will. But I also have friends who are so very important in my life. I love them just as much. For me, it's hard to distinguish levels of love between family and friends. Everyone in my life is extremely important to me, and I love them all so much, and for all different reasons. I do thank God quite often for allowing me to be so lucky to have such wonderful family, and great friends. I'm not sure I'd be where I am today without them!

Question #131 - Describe your favorite winter activities.

2008-12-28T23:03:00.002-05:00

Winter is more difficult for me than the summer. At least with the summer, if I don't go anywhere during the day, I can open up windows and my front door and enjoy the warmth. I'm closed in during the winter, and sometimes shut in for days! Some of my favorite things to do on cold winter days include:

*make hot chocolate
*have a pajama day!
*play on the laptop all afternoon
*make jewelry
*read and/or take a nap (usually it's both! lol)
*clean, if I'm really really bored

I have to plan my days around the weather usually in the winter. Pulmonary rehab has been a nice thing for me to escape to most days, but if it's way too cold out to go there, I try to exercise at home on my treadmill. I also try to get to the stores when the weather isn't bad, and to visit Mandy and the kids, as long as they aren't sick! Winter is pretty yucky, and I usually can't wait until it ends!!!

Question #130 - What's my favorite Christmas present I remember getting?

2008-12-15T23:29:00.002-05:00

There have been sooo many Christmas presents over the years. Top gifts I remember have included a black rabbit, a hockey table, a Cabbage Patch doll, and Tickle Me Elmos! I have loved so many of my gifts, even if I can't remember them all!!

I would have to say, though, that my favorite Christmas present is the one that is trying to bite my hand right now!! Mittens was a gift from Erin, one of my best friends, and I surely thought I'd never get a cat from someone! I've loved cats so much since I was little, but just couldn't ever have one because half my family is allergic to them. So to actually get a bundle of fur in the shape of a kitten was so exciting for me! And Mittens has become my son, despite the fact that he isn't human!! lol

Question #129 - What's my favorite Christmas memory?

2008-12-13T20:07:00.002-05:00

Yes, it's been awhile since I answered a question! I go through spurts where trying to answer one every day just gets very boring. Too much thinking!! LOL

I think my favorite memory about Christmas would have to be going to see Santa Claus at the now defunct Rainbow Mall, down near the Falls. For the longest time, when we were kids, the Santa Claus was the most awesome Santa ever! He seriously looked like Santa, with a real beard, and a genuine laugh. He spent several minutes with every child who sat on his lap, and after we told him our desires for that year, he would give us an envelope of pixie dust. He told us we had to sprinkle it in the snow on Christmas Eve, so he would see it twinkle, and he'd know he had to stop at that house to bring toys. He just seemed so real to so many kids! I was sad many years ago when I found out he had passed away. I honestly don't think I'll ever see another Santa who could just feel so authentic!

Another favorite memory is when my sisters and I would open our gifts to each other on Christmas Eve. I always looked forward to those gifts. Somehow they meant so much more than gifts from Santa, because they were from my sisters. It was also fun to have something to do while waiting for our parents to get up in the morning, so we could open up the gifts!!

Question #128 - What was my favorite birthday? What was the best birthday gift I ever got?

2008-11-25T14:37:00.002-05:00

One of my most memorable birthdays would have to be when I turned 25, I believe. A bunch of us got dressed up and hit the bars down on Third Street. At the one bar we went to, we knew the owner, and he gave me a bottle of champagne to celebrate! I don't remember paying for a drink at all that night, and I know that I got pretty trashed. lol But, it was fun! I danced with my friends and my sister, and by the time I got home, I just crashed in my bed with all my clothes on!

My birthday this past September would have to be one of my favorites recently. We went bowling, and it was a blast! I haven't bowled in ages, and neither had anyone else. It was a great time, and we had a lot of laughs!! I'd definitely love to go again sometime, just for something fun and different to do!

I have gotten so many great gifts over the year for my birthday, that I just can't pick one out that's my favorite. I honestly love that my family and friends spend time celebrating my birthday with me. That is way better than the gifts!!

Question #127 - Describe my first driving experience.

2008-11-23T22:30:00.002-05:00

My parents used to have a big station wagon when I could have gotten a driver's permit in high school. While I got my permit, I really didn't want to drive that car! It was too huge!! Unfortunately, that was the only car I could really practice with. But, I didn't get my driver's license until I was 20. By that time, my parents had bought a car for my sister, Lisa, and I to use. It was a 1987 Buick Skylark, and it was definitely smaller than the big station wagon! I remember going for my driver's license road exam. I was so worried about failing with the parallel parking, but I aced that. I got 2 marks against me, and I think one of them was for being too far left in the road. I passed the road test the first time, and I wanted my mom to drive home for some reason! I also remember on my first trip to my dad's workshop without an adult, I was at a light, and when it turned green, I turned left immediately without waiting for the other car who had the right of way. I was very lucky that I wasn't hit, but I realized it was such a stupid mistake, that I didn't do it ever again!! That was really what I remembered as part of my first driving experiences after I got my license!!

Question #126 - Did I have a favorite blanket or toy growing up?

2008-11-20T22:54:00.002-05:00

I don't really remember having a favorite blanket growing up, but I had several favorite toys. One was my Barbie. She was the Peachs N Cream Barbie, with a long peach gown and a peach wrap thing to go around her shoulders. I also liked my Barbie car, with seat belts! Of course, I always got so frustrated with the seat belts that I never put them on. lol I also used to like my Hot Wheels car that had a key you put in the back of it. I loved my Cabbage Patch, and I named her Idaline Marie. My aunt made a bunch of clothes for her, and for my sister's Cabbage Patch dolls. I really liked my Transformer, too! It used to turn into a microscope that I could really use! Oh, and I had a Pound Puppy that I loved, too! I guess I really didn't have one toy that I loved for a long period of time! And the funny thing is, I still have everything, except the Transformer. And the Barbie car!

Question #125 - Am I a forgiving person? Is there anyone I need to forgive, and what's the game plan?

2008-11-19T21:33:00.002-05:00

I usually don't get into fights are arguments with many people. At least, I try not to! But there have been some instances where I've really gotten into it with someone in my family, or an occasional friend. I've gotten very angry with some people, and although I have forgiven them for whatever it was they made me mad about, it took an awful long time. I've had to reason with myself sometimes to just say I'm sorry, because there have been grudges that just aren't worth staying angry over. Recently, though, I can't seem to forgive someone who hurt me really bad over the summer. After spending over a year getting really close with him, and then a summer of it all falling apart, then big misunderstandings, it's going to take me a while to forgive him for being so selfish. He still wanted to be friends a month after we had stopped talking, and that made me even angrier. I know I will let go eventually. We don't even communicate anymore. But right now, even though I should forgive because it doesn't matter anymore, I just can't seem to do it. I guess I still hurt, and it's because he just didn't get it!! I know I will one day, but just not right now.

Question #124 - Am I a good listener? How can I improve this?

2008-11-16T13:51:00.002-05:00

A lot of people tell me I am a good listener. I like to be there for someone. If they are ranting and raving, or crying and upset, I am there to listen if they need me. So I'm not sure how much I can improve on that! What I CAN improve on is cutting off my mom when she's trying to tell me something. I do it often. I don't really do it on purpose, it's just kind of a reaction. I think I know what she is going to say, so I disagree right away, or say something else about it, and she gets rather irritated that I've cut her off. AGAIN. Sooo, I would say that I really need to try harder and let my mom finish talking and finishing her thoughts BEFORE I interrupt or respond!! I know she would soooo agree with me on this, too!!!

Question #123 - Am I a good communicator? How can I improve on this?

2008-11-15T22:57:00.002-05:00

I think sometimes I am a good communicator, and in some situations, I'm not. If I'm talking about a subject I know and understand, then I can go on about it without hesitation. If I'm put on the spot with a question, I don't do too well with that. I feel like I fumble and can't get my words out right. I end up being nervous and wish I could run away!! I'm usually good at trying to describe things to people, except for directions. I'm horrible with directions, and I usually just say I don't know how to get there if someone asks me!!

How can I improve on any of this?? Be prepared?? Try not to be so nervous?? Maybe admit if I don't know something, and not worry about it too much?? I don't know!!

Question #122 - What is your favorite music group? Why?

2008-11-14T19:58:00.002-05:00

I love music, and I love a wide variety of music. The only music I really don't like is country, and heavy metal. Music helps me get into the mood to do stuff, like clean, or gets me out of a funk if I'm feeling yucky or irritated. I have a lot of musical talents that I really like, but there are a couple that just absolutely get me moving and grooving when I hear them. Janet Jackson is one artist who I've loved since I was a little girl. Whenever I felt sick, or really tired, I liked to listen to her songs, and I would perk up. I've seen Janet in concert twice, and the shows were well worth the ridiculous amount of money I paid!! I have Janet's music on everything from my computer to my phone, and it doesn't matter that I've heard the songs a thousand times. Every time I hear one, it's like it's the first time all over again!

I also love the Barenaked Ladies. They are a Canadian band that slowly grew popular in the U.S. I've seen them many times in concert, and they are the funniest band I've seen perform! Their songs are quirky and fun, and some of them don't make sense, but that is what's so entertaining about these 5 men! Yes, the Barenaked Ladies are a group of men, and NO they are not naked!!! LOL!

Simon & Garfunkel is another group I've loved since I was little, and that is because of my dad. He would always listen to the records, or sing along to one of their songs on the radio when I was little. Whenever I hear one of their songs today, I immediately think of my dad. I never ever thought I would see Simon & Garfunkel play live, considering they weren't even together anymore, until several years ago. They got together again for a tour, and I saw them live in Buffalo with my parents. I will never forget when they both came on stage at the beginning. I actually cried! And I don't cry that easily!! It was sooo emotional! Not only was I able to see them play TOGETHER, I was there with my dad. Out of all the concerts I've been to (and there have been a lot!), the Simon & Garfunkel one is on top of my list of favorites, for sure!

Question #121 - What is my favorite food? When I cook for my family, what do I enjoy making most?

2008-11-13T22:12:00.002-05:00

I love pasta. And cheese. Pasta and cheese together is fabulous! I pretty much enjoy a lot of foods, and I'm usually willing to try things at least once to see if I like it. I don't have a family living with me to cook for, but I've had my parents over to eat several times. I think my favorite thing to make is tuna noodle casserole. It was a dish my mom made when we were growing up (not everyone's fav though, I know Mandy won't ever eat it again lol), and I know she still makes it today. In fact, when either one of us say we are going to make it, we ask if we are invited over. lol It's just a yummy dish! Oh, and I like it either hot or cold! And sometimes it's good for breakfast!!

Question #120 - What is my full name, and who am I named after? If I could change my name, what would it be?

2008-11-12T22:08:00.002-05:00

My first name is Colleen, an Irish name since my Mom's side of the family is Irish (and Polish). I know I have my last name on another website, but I'm not keen on putting it here. And I wouldn't put my middle name here, either!! In this day and age of identity theft, it would be rather foolish of me to type my entire name! Let's just say my last name is very German, my Dad's side of the family. I don't think I'd change my name to anything else, though. I rather like it! I do know that if I had been a boy, my name would have been Joel. Not sure I like that name. And I hope I don't offend any Joels who may read this!!!

Question #119 - What pets have I had? Which one was my favorite?

2008-11-11T21:37:00.003-05:00

My first pet was a hamster. I don't remember its name. I don't really remember how old I was when I had it. Well, we had it. Lisa and Mandy were around when we had it, but I don't remember if Joan was yet. Actually, she may have been a wee little one. So I'd say I would have had to be around the age of 8 or so. Anyway, I always get picked on about this, but for SOME REASON, I decided it would be cool to see what would happen if I hit the hamster on the head with it's water dish. Well, the poor hamster stopped moving, and I saw some red near it's mouth. Yes, stupid little 8yr old Colleen killed the hamster!! I still feel bad about that, and I actually still remember my insides shaking when I had to explain what happened to the poor little guy. I believe the hamster is buried in the backyard at my parents' house. Sorry little hamster!!!

We used to have a big aquarium for awhile in the dining room, and lots of cool fish. My favorite one was a silver dollar named George. He lasted awhile, even after the aquarium was taken down. He was then put in a big bowl on the shelf in the living room until he died. I think it's where my love of all things aquatic started!!

The next pet I remember getting is a black rabbit one Christmas. I can still remember my dad leaving for the basement, and coming back a few minutes later with this furry thing in his arms. He put it in the living room and we were so surprised! Shockingly, we named the rabbit.....Blacky!! Blacky stayed with us for a few years. He lived outside in a big wire cage during the summer, near the broccoli my mom would plant (big mistake, Blacky wasn't too happy that he couldn't reach the leaves, and I'd hear him thumping his foot!!). In the winter, we kept him in the basement. I remember letting Blacky run around the basement to get exercise, and one time he hid under my dad's workbench area. I tried to get him, and he bit me! It was the worst pain, it felt like an electrical charge went through me. I actually thought I had hit a loose wire, until I saw the bit marks!! Blacky was a nice pet, though, but sadly he eventually had to be given away. My dad was really allergic to him, and a couple of my sisters as well. We were told Blacky went to my dad's friend's farm. It really was kinda sad!

When I was in middle school, we got a parakeet. I don't remember exactly how long we had it, but I used to let the bird sit in its cage on the front porch in the summer, to get fresh air! One day, Lisa was playing with the cage, and the next thing I knew, the bird flew out. I was beyond upset! I remember going up and down the street on my bike, looking to the trees, to see if I could find it. Like it really would have come back! My parents took me that night to the pet store to pick out another bird, and I got a yellow one, and named her Melon. Melon lasted a loooooong time, at least 8 years believe. I remember having her all through high school and part of college. Melon was kind of a soulmate. She taught herself to get out of her cage and fly to me. She used to nap with me on my pillow. I just loved that bird! I used to have to twist tie the cage doors shut when my Grandma would visit so Melon wouldn't get out and fly around, because my Grandma hates birds. Melon started getting sick one year, and it got to the point where I had to keep her in a shoebox and feed her with a dropper because she would keep falling off her perch. When Melon died, I was incredibly sad. I never had a pet that was so attached to me before, and vice versa. My mom got me another bird the next day, but that one (Mokey) just was never the same!

Our family got our first dog in 1994, a couple months after my grandpa had died. I remember going to Lewiston with my mom and one of my sisters (Mandy maybe??), and sitting in a car while our mom went into a house for several minutes. We thought it had something to do with grandpa, but when she came out with a puppy in her arms, we wondered what the heck was going on! Mom said the puppy was coming home with us! WHAT?????? We got home with the puppy, and kept her on the porch for a bit, trying to feed her milk, and showing her off to the neighbors. My mom brought the puppy into the house, and into the bedroom where my dad was. He didn't look too pleased about it! It was rather strange, because my mom never really wanted a dog when we were growing up, and here she brought it home and my dad was acting if-fy about it! Anyway, my mom named the puppy Lady. Lady was a black Lab, with some white in her chest and on her nose, and with 2 different colored eyes. Lady loved all of us, and we all loved her, but I would have to say my dad became her biggest fan. Lady, sadly, only lived to be about 4 years old because she got really sick (we think by eating the sprayed grass from the lady next door). My parents brought her to the vet several times, and they tried to help her, but there wasn't much they could do. My parents finally decided to have Lady put to sleep, but the night before they were to take her, Lady crawled into the hallway to my parents' bedroom. My dad sat down with her, and Lady crawled into his lap and died. I was sick at that time, and coughing my brains out, and I was going to go down for medicine, but my mom came upstairs with some. She told me that Lady had just died, and she didn't want me to go down there. It was just an awfully sad situation. Lady is still missed today, we reminisce about her every once in awhile!!

Our next family pet was another dog, originally named Maggie. This little mutt (seriously, even the vet wasn't sure what she consisted of!) came to us by way of my Uncle Bob. Uncle Bob drove up from Horseheads, NY with this little mutt to see if we wanted her. She was cuuuuuuuuuute!! We decided to keep her, but her name had to go! Since my mom got to name Lady, my sisters and I wanted to name this dog, and we decided on Shelby, from our favorite movie, Steel Magnolias! Shelby is still around today, living down the street with my parents. Although she is not a puppy (I think she is 9), she still acts like it sometimes because she's a little dog!! She's got more energy than I do!!

When I moved into my apartment, I brought Mokey along with me, and I kept him in my bedroom. I tried to get Mokey to come out of the cage, but when he was out, he just wasn't a happy camper. He certainly wasn't anything like Melon was, and I didn't feel so attached, but one morning when I got up, I realized Mokey wasn't chirping or moving around as usual. I got my glasses on, took the blanket off the cage, and there he was, laying on the bottom. He had died some time during the night. And for not totally loving this bird as much as I had my other one, I cried so hard. I called my best friend at the time, because I was just so upset about it. I ended up getting rid of the cage and everything, and said that I had had it with birds!!

Three days after Mokey died, I got an early Christmas present. My best friend (now) Erin called me to ask if I was going to be home for awhile, and when I said yes, she said she was coming over with my Christmas gift. I hung up the phone, and started shaking a little. The only gift I thought she could be giving me that early before Christmas was a cat. Half an hour later, the doorbell rings. Erin and her fiance (at the time, they are now married) were at the door. Erin was holding something up near her neck, and when they got in the house, there was a tiny orange ball of fluff! Erin HAD gotten me a kitten, and all the stuff for it, too!! I held the kitten for at least 45 minutes, because there are certain cats that I have been sort of allergic to, and I wanted to make sure this one wouldn't be one of them! But, I never had a problem. After an hour, Erin and Mike left me alone with my brand new pet. A cat. An animal I had always loved and wanted when I was growing up, but never could have because half my family are allergic to them! I didn't know what to name the kitty, so I just played with him (her?? it was too young to know what it actually was yet!) for awhile before I had to leave for a concert I was going to that night. Yep, I left that kitty alone for a few hours while I sang and danced with the Barenaked Ladies (a Canadian band)!! I got home, and while I was getting ready to go out for a little bit to a bar, the little kitty was at my feet staring up at me. I studied it for a bit....mostly orange fur, with white paws and a white chest. Since it was around the holidays, and since I didn't want to name it a girly or boyish name since I didn't know what it was yet, I decided on Mittens. Well, Mittens ended up being a boy, and he's also been the "love of my life" in the almost 8 years that I got him. Mittens got HUGE, and he is my mini-lion! I adore the little man (I am going through many of his acquired nicknames here lol), and I thank God every day for letting this bundle of fur into my life.

Besides all of the pets above, I have also had many betta fish over the last 7 years or so. I just love them, they are beautiful fish!! Since they can only live one fish per tank, or bowl, I have become addicted to glassware!

Well, out of all my pets, I really would have to say Mittens has been my favorite so far. I think that is because he has been the first pet I've had since being on my own. He's been there since I had to quit working. He's been around when I've felt crappy, or sad. He is like my kid, only with a ton of fur and 4 legs. Like I said earlier, I am so thankful he is in my life, and I sure hope he will be for many more years!!

(Holy cow, this post is long!!!! LOL! Guess I must really love my pets to remember this much!!)

Question #118 - What is my favorite area in nature?

2008-11-10T15:37:00.002-05:00

Well, I live 5 minutes away from one of the greatest wonders in the world, Niagara Falls! You would think that I'd tire of seeing the Falls all the time, but it is one of the most peaceful places to go. Well, peaceful if you can find a spot where there aren't many tourists!! The power of the Falls is just amazing, and when I go visit (which I admit isn't often lately), the sound of the water falling is mesmerizing. I even love going down there at night, especially in the summer when they have fireworks shooting off from the Canadian side. It's hard to visit the Falls in the winter, but if I feel up to it, I just take a drive around. It's definitely a site that must be seen!!

Just A Brief Aside!

2008-11-10T15:34:00.002-05:00

I just realized I was getting comments on my journal jar. lol I didn't set it up to get emails that someone left a comment. Oooops!! Anyway, I read through the ones I've gotten. Thank you to Deb and Jen, and occasionally Nancy! It means a lot, especially with this blog. Some of these questions are really tough to answer!! lol

By the way, I have a couple websites where I am getting the questions from. I hope they last me for awhile!! I just keep going down the list, and this is only one website I've used so far. They are pretty good!

Question #117 - Do I have a favorite sport, talent, etc?

2008-11-09T22:14:00.002-05:00

I love hockey! Even though I don't get channels to actually watch games anymore, I still try to catch them when they are on. My dad played junior hockey when he was younger on a Canadian farm team. He actually got to play in 4 NHL games back then, for the Detroit Redwings. So, for that reason, Detroit is one of my favorite teams, along with the Buffalo Sabres! I have been to a few professional games, and I used to go to the club hockey games at Niagara University when I was a student, because I had friends on the team. I don't know what it is about hockey that I really like. Maybe it is the fast-paced style of the game!

I don't know what they mean by favorite talent, so I am going to interpret it as favorite actor/actress. I have always loved Sally Field and Tom Hanks. They have just been too great actors with many terrific performances! I also don't hear too much sleaze and stuff about them in the tabloids, which makes me like them even more!

Question #116 - Where is my most favorite place to go, what is it like?

2008-11-08T20:38:00.002-05:00

Well here in my apartment, my favorite place is my bedroom. I think I mentioned this in another post. After I re-painted and picked my favorite color, red, to use as accents, it's a room that I just love to hang out in. If I need to rest or take a nap, that is where I go. In the summer time, with both windows open on a breezy day, it's fabulous! I get such a nice comforting cross-breeze, and relaxing in there feels that much better. In the winter, I like to have pajama days on a really cold day when I know I sure as heck am not going anywhere, and I'll curl up under a blanket and read. Now that I have my laptop, I won't have to be in the computer room that often, where it usually gets pretty cold and doesn't heat well. That's one of the big reasons I got the laptop, so I could get out of that room in the winter!!

As far as a physical place to go, I used to love going to my Grandma's when we were little. When we go there now, there is usually a lot of family around. She lives in a very quiet area of NY, and it's really beautiful, too. Her backyard is huge, and there is a hill where my mom and all her brothers and sisters used to climb up when they were younger. Trust me, I never even attempted to climb that hill!! LOL! But, my sistores and I used to take long walks along the creek, and I loved those adventures. The creek back then used to be flowing for the most part. I haven't been back there in years (I usually find it too tiring to walk all the way there), but I don't hear many people talking about the water. Anyway, that used to be one of my favorite places to go when I was little.

Nowadays, I know it isn't traveling far, but I love to go to Mandy's house. Of course, I get to see my niece and nephew! But I also get to see Mandy, and I miss having her here, even though they've been in their house for almost 4.5 years now. It's hard to go over there in the winter when it's freezing, but when it is ok to go out, and I need a change of scenery, I like to go over and hang out!!

Question #115 - Do I enjoy my everyday life? What's it like?

2008-11-07T22:49:00.002-05:00

Many people ask me what I do during the day when I tell them I haven't worked for over 8 years. I think they must think I don't do much, and that I'm very bored. Well, most days I'm not. I get up in the mornings usually somewhere in between 9-9:30. I feed Mittens, get dressed and washed up, feed myself, and read on the computer for a bit. If it's Tuesday or Thursday, I go to pulmonary rehab from 11-12pm. On Tuesday afternoons, I host PH chat at 1pm, and it usually lasts an hour or two, depending who is there. Many afternoons I try to make jewelry, or clean, or just take it easy if I feel yucky. Some days I need to get groceries, or go to the store for stuff. Some days, I do things on the computer most of the day, which makes me feel real lazy! However, being on the computer is part of my every day life! Often I take naps in the later afternoon, like around 3 or 3:30. Some days I can get by without one. I make dinner in the evening and always eat around 6pm. I watch some shows, and then get back on the laptop. Monday and Tuesday evenings, I tutor. Wednesday evenings I host PH chat. Many nights I chat on the phone with friends to see how their day went. Every day, I keep myself busy in some way or another. And I am very thankful that I have days I can do nothing if I need to because I feel like crap. I would say I enjoy my life as it is for the most part! Being able to do what I want, when I want, and if I can has been helpful in the past several years. I think if I did have to worry about going to a daily job, I might be telling a much different story!

Question #114 - What are some of my talents?

2008-11-06T22:11:00.002-05:00

I know I'm not musically gifted, since it's been a couple decades since I played the organ, and I sure as heck can't sing! I can't draw well, stick figures are a specialty if I must create something. I guess a talent would have to be making jewelry. This was not something that I've had all my life, but something that's been building up for the past eight years since I had to quit teaching. I love to buy pretty beads, and think of patterns and different combinations to make necklaces, earrings, and other things. Most of my stuff comes out really nice, and I guess I must be good at it because I have sold quite a bit over the years!

Question #113 - What's my most favorite movie, book, poem, or song?

2008-11-05T22:12:00.002-05:00

I have three favorite movies that I could watch over and over and over, and probably never get tired of them! One is Monty Python & The Holy Grail. I heard friends in high school quote this movie, and had no clue what the heck they were talking about. It wasn't until probably college that I saw the movie, and I LOVED it!! I can't even begin to count how many times I've seen it, and now I own the special edition version, and I play it when I feel like quoting an entire movie!

Pretty Woman is one I fell in love with years ago, and every time it comes on tv (usually TBS!), I watch it. That includes if they play it three nights in a row. I end up watching it over anything else. I know, crazy!

Steel Magnolias is another great movie, and it is one that will forever remind me of my sistores (sisters). It's one we could probably all sit together and quote, and we often do when we talk about stuff. This movie is another one that I will watch if I see it on tv!

One of my favorite books was Island of the Blue Dolphins, by Scott O'Dell. I still read it occasionally. I think I liked it so much because it was so descriptive to me when I was a little girl, and the images I had in my head were almost real, like I was a part of the story. I have read hundreds of books since then, and that one always sticks out as my favorite!

I really don't have any favorite poems. As for songs, my favorite one is Girls Just Wanna Have Fun, by Cyndi Lauper!! I have told people that I'd like that song played at my funeral, but I'm pretty sure the priest would highly disapprove!! lol

Question #112 - What is my most favorite thing to do at home?

2008-11-04T14:44:00.002-05:00

It's no secret that I love to be online. It's definitely something I am doing quite often throughout the day. I read my emails, write in my blogs, chat with friends, and phriends. I catch up on PH news several times a day, and I also go to social networking sites often. Shopping for stuff on ebay, as well as other sites, makes me happy. And anything bead-related is usually searched for by me! My computer is my network to the outside world, especially when I am not feeling well, and can't really get out in the real world for days. So, I would have to pick being on my laptop (or computer, but mostly laptop nowadays!) as my favorite thing to do at home!

Question #111 - Describe a time when you felt the spirit strongly.

2008-11-03T12:48:00.004-05:00

When I was a little girl, my parents would often bring me to healing masses. I think they really hoped that bringing me to one of these masses would allow me to be completely healed, that I would be a whole person again, and wouldn't have to deal with my illness anymore. Most of the time while growing up, my parents (and eventually myself, when I got old enough to really understand my health issues) focused more on my heart than the fact I had PH. I think that was because no one really explained to any of us what PH was. Anyway, I remember that at one of the masses, I stood up with a line of people at the altar, waiting to be blessed by the priest. I don't remember exactly how old I was. Maybe 10 or 11, maybe 13. I just don't remember. What I DO remember is that when the priest put his hand on me for a blessing, I immediately fell backwards. I was caught by someone behind me, and they just laid me down on the floor. I could still hear people around me, but all I felt was an incredible warmth in my chest, right over my heart. I laid there for what seemed like forever, before I finally got up and went back to my parents. I told them what I was feeling, because that warmth over my heart was still there, and it was very strong. I was not healed, but then maybe I was. Perhaps not healed in the physical sense, but I believed that my belief in the Lord was solidified by feeling the warmth in my heart. I used to feel that warmth every once in awhile since then, but not for a very very long time. However, this past Sunday in church, for whatever reason, I felt that warmth for the first part of mass. I felt like a basket case during church, I couldn't get my tears to stop suddenly appearing, but that warmth just made me feel blessed all over again. Maybe the Lord was telling me that he is still here for me, whenever I need Him. It was just a wonderful feeling to have again.

Question #110 - What are some of the events that are happening in the world right now?

2008-11-02T12:58:00.002-05:00

We are two days away from one of the biggest Presidential elections ever. This election seems to have gone on for years, it's been on everyone's mind forever. This year will be a first no matter what party wins: could be the first time a women becomes Vice-President, or, could be the first time this nation has a black President. As with any election, campaign ads are constantly bombarding the airwaves, newspapers print "He said this" and "He did that." The internet has thousands of ordinary Americans getting involved by posting videos on YouTube, and in blogs, etc, etc. Other countries are even anxious about who will be the next President, because they obviously want change as much as we Americans do!

The economy is another huge, huge, issue happening in the world today, and unfortunately the news hasn't been good in the past few months. The stock market keeps making record drops and gains, stores are closing up shop, even ones who have been around for decades. The impending Christmas holiday is making people nervous this year because with the housing disaster and lost jobs, this year might be one of the worst on record. It's a scary time for many people, yet others seem to take it in stride and just want to ride out the storm. Shockingly, gas prices are dropping after all time high prices even a month ago, and that seems to be one small bit of good news lately!

Question #109 - What is the weirdest dream you've ever had?

2008-11-01T12:17:00.002-04:00

I have had some really bizarre dreams, some that wake me up and make me wonder what the heck that was all about!! I think most of the oddball ones happen when I'm stressing about something, but there are some that just seem to come out of nowhere. I blog a lot about some of the strange ones, and I had to go back to find one I dreamt a month or so ago to find the description. This was the dream!

I dreamt that for some odd reason, my parents had two squirrels as pets, along with Shelby (she's their dog), and they were trying to get the squirrels to learn tricks. The squirrels had these little stuffed animals that my parents were trying to train them to go fetch. (Ok, now I'm starting to laugh hysterically again) I was getting irritated because I wanted one of those stuffed animals for Mittens, because it was the perfect size for him, and he needs a new replacement for his little stuffed bear because it has seen better days. I kept trying to get the stuffed animal away from a squirrel (neither of the squirrels had names), but the stupid thing kept getting it back. And then I woke up!!

I really don't know where that dream came from, but just reading about it again has me laughing all over!! Very bizarre, that's for sure!!!!

Question #108 - Am I pleased with what I look like? If I could change any part of myself, what would it be?

2008-10-29T19:34:00.002-04:00

I was not comforable with how I looked until probably the past 7 years or so. I really hated how I looked growing up. I had huge glasses, lots of acne, braces for several years, and I just did not think I was all that pretty. I never had a boyfriend in high school, and I never got asked out until I was a junior in college, so I thought a lot of that had to do with my looks.

I think I have gotten a bit more confidence in myself over the last several years, funnily enough, after needing to wear oxygen a lot more. I think the fact I wear it has made me not care what people think. I've also gotten a lot of compliments on my looks, many from complete strangers. I figured if they think that I'm hot, I guess I must be! LOL!

I think the one thing I'd change about myself is probably my skin. I still deal with acne, and I can't tell you how frustrating it is. I keep trying new skin products, and I even asked my gyn about going on Yaz, which is supposed to help with acne. While I think it's helping a little, it's still early to tell whether or not it's actually going to really work. It's just frustrating to be 33 and STILL dealing with acne!!

Question #107 - What do I think of myself?

2008-10-28T22:24:00.002-04:00

I think that I am a pretty upbeat person, as much as I can be with living with PH. I am a caring person, usually the one calling or emailing people I haven't heard from in a long time to find out how they are doing. I love my family and friends more than anything else. I always want to make sure they are doing well. I think I am a person who is pretty easy going. I like to hang out with family and friends, watch movies, go for coffee, whatever. I don't usually complain to much, or at least I try not to. I think that I am a shy person when I meet someone for the first time, or if I go some place I am not familiar with. I do tend to warm up to people easily, though. I am trusting in a lot of situations, but very untrusting in others. I think I can be a procrastinator, but sometimes that is when I work best, when it comes down to crunch time. I am a silly person at times, especially around little kids! Well, I can be silly around big kids, too! lol I would generally have to say I think of myself as a person who just tries to live life as best I can, and I try to make sure I stay positive about things often!

Question #106 - Have you ever written a story, poem, or song that you would like to share in your journal?

2008-10-26T19:22:00.002-04:00

I wrote this poem a couple years ago when it seemed like we were losing phriends left and right. It was a very hard thing to go through. We just had that happen recently, and it's just upsetting to lose a phriend, especially when it isn't expected.

When A Phriend Becomes An Angel

When a PHriend becomes an angel,
We may feel shocked and very sad.
We may not understand why,
We may feel so very bad.

When a PHriend becomes an angel,
We mourn the life that should have been.
We hoped they’d see more years to come,
More time with family and friends.

When a PHriend becomes an angel,
We begin to have more fears.
When will it be my time to go?
Is it months or maybe years?

But when a Phriend becomes an angel,
We start to also realize.
There will no longer be the hardships,
No more pains and no more cries.

When a PHriend becomes an angel,
They are now in so much peace.
Breathing easier forever more,
Watching over loved ones with such ease.

To my Phriends who have sadly passed away,
So suddenly gone within this year.
Please know how much I love you,
How you have become so very dear.

~Colleen Schnell

Question #105 - What does my bedroom look like? Am I comfortable in my room? What do I like best about my bedroom?

2008-10-25T16:08:00.002-04:00

When I moved in almost 1o years ago, we painted the room I chose as my bedroom white, and I eventually put up a green ivy-ish border. Eventually, that got old! I bought my queen-sized bed probably about 5 years or so ago. I can't really remember, maybe it was a bit longer than that! But about 3 years ago, I wanted to do an overhaul on the color in my room. My friend helped me paint it a nice taupe-ish sort of color. We did about an inch border around the perimeter of the ceiling, and left the rest of the ceiling white. I chose my accent colors to decorate....what else but my favorite color, red!! I bought a reddish bedspread set, and reddish valance panels, and I have red pictures up on the walls. I also have a new table lamp with a red shade.

I LOVE my bedroom! It's one of the rooms that I find the most comfortable. I think my most favorite thing in there is the bed. It's huge, and the frame is so beautiful! I found it online years ago, and just fell in love with it. My bedroom is my comfort zone. If I'm feeling crappy, that's where I go rest. When I read, that is where I'll go. I love taking naps with Mittens, and the bed is definitely big enough for both of us! lol

Question #104 - What are some of my jobs at home?

2008-10-24T13:57:00.002-04:00

Ok, I do admit that the questions I've been answering lately are meant for youths who may be doing a journal jar in school or something. BUT, I think that a lot of the questions are very relevant for any age!!

That being said, since I live by myself, I have the unfortunate task of keeping my own place clean all by myself. And being that I have PH, it's not always an easy task. I've almost lived here for 10 years, and over those years, I've put my priorities in certain tasks, and less priority in others. For example, dusting gets done maybe a few times a year. Vacuuming is something supposed to be left for my mom to do when she comes over once in awhile, but there are times when it's beyond desparate around here (ummmm, cat with a crapload of fur!!!) that I do end up doing it myself. I crank up the oxygen, and take my good old time doing it! I do my dishes once or twice a week, depending how much I'm using. I sweep a few times a month, and I've just gotten a Dirt Devil Kone to go around the corners and pick up crumbs that I don't want to drag the vacuum out for. I do laundry a few times a month. Let's face it, the stairs aren't fun going down to the basement, so I certainly want to kill myself over them once a week doing laundry! How much laundry could one person have a week anyway?? Not much! Changing the bedding is done about once a month, because it's a chore that really gets me tired. I clean the bathroom a couple times a month, the tub being the worst part of it since I had bending over to scrub it out!! Sometimes I'll take an extra long shower to just clean the tub out then. It may seem to some people that I am not that clean of a person, but that isn't the case. Cleaning out the entire litter box just exhausts me, but I take a long time to do it, and it gets done. Obviously if I wasn't living with PH, I might be doing all these chores a lot more often. Emphasis on MIGHT. lol No really, I wouldn't have to mentally prepare myself to deal with being out of breath or being very exhausted after doing some sort of chore if I were a "normal" person. But since that isn't the case, I do what I can at my own pace, and if someone thinks my place is a mess, or that I don't clean things often enough, well that's just too damn bad!!

Question #103 - Have I ever stood up for what I believe, even when it was very hard? When?

2008-10-24T13:41:00.002-04:00

A very thoughtful question. Well, I stand up for myself in how I feel in my relationship with God, and I've been challenged for it a few times by some people. I understand that there are people out there who are cynical and don't believe in anything, and I don't have any harsh words for that. It's their choice to feel that way. But when they put me down for my beliefs, that is when I get irritated. I used to not really say anything, but nowadays, I have to tell the person questioning my faith that I believe in God because I don't believe I would have been around this long without Him. God has gotten me through some really tough periods in my life, and I will not let anyone challenge my belief about Him.

Question #102 - When were my parents most proud of me?

2008-10-24T13:39:00.001-04:00

I guess I could answer this question like I answered the previous one. I am sure my parents are proud of many things I have accomplished. I most recently heard from my new upstairs neighbor that my mom told her how proud she was of me at my support group meeting on Saturday afternoon. Hearing that makes me feel happy, and I am glad to know that how much she is proud of what I can do. I hear from random people about how my dad also talks about his daughters, and how proud he is of what we've done in our lives. It's a good feeling, to know that whatever we are doing is impressing them enough to brag!

Wendy's Mom said...
AMEN!! BTW, I am enjoying your journal jar so much. Where do you find the questions? I think it would be fun to see how other people answer some of these questions. LOL!! Love,Sheila

Question #101 - When was I most proud of myself?

2008-10-24T13:38:00.000-04:00

Hmmmmmm. I can't really say there has been one specific moment where I've been proud of myself. I have moments all the time. I was proud of graduating college. I was proud of becoming more sure of myself, being in a brand new school with no one to hold me back, when I went to college. I was proud of doing well in college and graduating with an education degree. I was proud of getting a teaching job at a daycare, and then my own classroom a couple months after that at Headstart. I was proud to get a Masters degree in early childhood education, despite the fact I had to quit teaching and would never return to a classroom. I was proud in moving out of my parents' house and being able to live on my own. I was proud in deciding to start a PH support group in my area. I was proud in trying to make jewelry more than a hobby. I was proud of many of my past decisions, and I am sure that I will continue to be proud of many more things to come in my life!

Question #100 - Have I ever learned anything valuable from being in an argument with someone? If yes, what?

2008-10-24T13:36:00.001-04:00

I don't often get into arguments. I hate them, they make me feel completely stressed out, shaken, and I usually feel like crap for days after arguing. I try to avoid them at all costs!! I can't even remember the last time I really got into an argument. I have had several arguments, pretty rough ones, with my sisters over the years, but that seems like ages ago. I guess one thing I have learned is that if things are really heated, and the yelling seems to be getting higher and higher, both parties need to stop and walk away from each other. Nothing can be accomplished from screaming, and it only makes things worse, I feel. I think arguments can also be avoided, or at least toned down a bit, if the issue at hand is commented on asap. If someone is left stewing and brewing about an issue, and doesn't bring it up for days or weeks at a time, and then it suddenly blows up, it's unhealthy for both parties. Especially the one who was brewing!

Jen said...
I agree..I hate arguements and hollering...But I guess we all have had our share...BTW..Am I suppose to comment these??LOLTake careLove ya,Jen

Nancy said...
I used to argue a lot with one of my sisters when I was in high school. Thankfully, those days are gone and we have learned how to really talk out a problem. I like the Journal Poem. Is it new or did I overlook it earlier?

Question #99 - Who is your best friend? What is s/he like?

2008-10-24T13:35:00.001-04:00

Well I have a great group of girlfriends, and every one of them mean so much to me. They pretty much know a lot going on in my life, but no one knows as much as my two best friends, Erin and Eve. I've known these two since 9th grade, and they have been such awesome friends to me throughout the years. They are like two extra sisters really! Erin is practical about everything, and has a lovely little girl who is so cute! Eve is kooky and crazy and very goofy, and she has a son who is my godson. When the three of us get together, we have so much fun! Eve and Erin give me dirty, evil looks when I try to pay for something when we are out. lol Some day I will sneak in some bills, if they aren't looking!! The three of us have shared so much with each other about our lives, that I just can't imagine them not being around forever. We take care of each other in different ways, and it's a friendship that is more like a sisterhood. Not everyone has that kind of friendship a lot, and for me to have TWO best friends like that, well, I feel so blessed!!

Question #98 - What are your goals and dreams?

2008-10-24T13:33:00.001-04:00

After losing my goals and dreams for what I wanted 8 years ago when I had to quit my preschool teaching job, I am finally realizing that for so many people, what they originally wanted in life sometimes needs to be altered for various reasons. Although I grew up living with PH and congenital heart disease, that didn't mean I didn't have goals for myself. I had wanted to be a teacher ever since I was in the 8th grade. I never thought of anything else, it was my goal all through high school to go to college for a teaching degree, so I could one day have my own classroom. I achieved that goal, and started out on the teaching trail by subbing, then working in a daycare as a teacher, and then getting a preschool job at Headstart. I eventually moved out on my own, another goal accomplished, and I was pretty happy. I was also hoping to meet someone and get married, but there was no time frame in that. I was just living my life, working, going to grad school, and enjoying myself!

Everything changed the year I started getting really sick all the time. That was from 1999-2000. When I had to finally give up my dream and quit, I admit to being "lost" for awhile. What was I supposed to do now? While I did end up finishing my grad degree in early childhood, I couldn't use it in the capacity I wanted to, in the classroom. It was pretty devastating to realize a dream you've had for years needs to be dropped.

But the initial shock of not teaching anymore slowly wore off. After a few years, I was given an opportunity to change my goal in life. I was told that I should start a support group in the Buffalo/Niagara Falls region for PH patients living here. At first I scoffed at the idea. Me, talk in front of adults about PH?? I didn't feel I could do that, being that I'm usually shy around strangers and especially when I have to get in front of them to talk!! But I prayed about it, thought about it, contemplated it, and prayed some more. After about a week or so, I finally decided to go ahead and try it. And while I still get nervous talking in front of people, I do it, and it's because those people have told me how much they appreciate me starting a group. My new goal in life has been to help fellow PHers, whether in "real" life with my support group, or in the online community with all my new phamily. It's been a huge part in my life now, and I can't imagine doing much else!

Nancy said...
With a few changes your post could be about me. I wanted to teach since I was a child: I played "school" all the time. I made my teaching job my whole life, and when my PH brought my job to an end, I was in a tail spin. I was so depressed and angry, angry at everyone and everything. Now after three years of not teaching, I am enjoying my "new normal." I, too, started a support group. We are kindred spirits.

Jen said...
Your goals and dreams of helping fellow PHers ...well you do that each and everyday..You are such a special PHriend:))Keep doing what you do...Love & Hugs,Jen

Question #97 - Who are you closest to in your immediate family? How did your relationship grow?

2008-10-24T13:31:00.001-04:00

This is tough. I think my Mom is the one I rely on the most, especially since I've been out of work for so long. She is there for me all the time, and in so many ways. I tell her almost everything, and some things I shouldn't even bother telling. She helps me get groceries, she goes to the stores with me a lot, she calls to see if I need to go anywhere. She comes over and vacuums for me, she helps clean around here if I need the help. She's usually with me at my doctor appointments. I appreciate everything she does for me, and I feel like I don't adequately thank her for what she does.

I have three sisters, and over the years, I've been close to them all in different ways. My sisters, or sistores, as we've called each other for years, are so important to me. I love them so much. It's hard to say who I am closest to, although Joan and Mandy have been the ones I talk to most in the last several years. I talk to Lisa mostly when I call her, and we only see her a few times a year now that she's been living in North Carolina. But I am proud of her and the fact she's had the guts out of all of us to move and make a good life for herself. Joan is the one who cracks me up the most. She is a smart and funny person, who has a lot of potential for great things if she puts her mind to it. But I guess if I had to pick one of them that I was closest to, it would be Mandy. It's funny how, when we were still living at home, Mandy and I would get in such horrible fights. Well I guess that isn't too funny! But when I moved out, and then about a year and a half later, Mandy moved upstairs from me, things changed. We were living together, but not completely together. I miss the times when I'd go upstairs and chat away, or watch tv, or eat something yummy she'd made for dinner. I talk to Mandy a lot during the week nowadays, and I admire how much she's done in the last few years with her family life. Oh heck, my sistores just mean a lot, and they are all talented, funny, loving and caring women. I always want them best for them, and I hope they are all truly happy in their lives. That's what I want for them most.

Jen said...
Can I borrow your family for awhile??LOLI am glad that are so good to you..Your Mom always sounds like such an Angel...like Mother like Daughter...Love Ya,Jen

Question #96 - Who are some of your favorite people? Why?

2008-10-24T13:29:00.001-04:00

Well the most obvious answer to this question would be my family and friends! Growing up with Pulmonary Hypertension hasn't been a very easy road, but the people in my life have made that road much easier to deal with. My parents have always been there for most of my doctor appointments, especially the major ones. My sisters have always been a big support, whether that's just been to play games when we were little, to having in depth conversations about what goes on in our lives now. I know they will always be there for me, and that is comforting.I have a close circle of friends, and each one of them means something different to me. I have two best friends who know me sometimes better than I know myself! My other friends do unexpected things for me, and it's appreciated so much. I only wish I could do for them what they've done for me. My friends are important to me, because if I didn't have them, I would probably not be who I am today.

Another group of my favorite people are my phriends. Without them, I would feel lost and all alone in dealing with PH, like I felt growing up. No one completely gets me and how I feel on a daily basis than my phriends, who go through much of the same thing I do. The PH message boards are a great source of information and support, and the chat room sessions can get fun and crazy, as well as emotional and uplifting. I don't know what I would do if I hadn't found this community of people several years ago. I don't think I would have even started a support group in Buffalo/Niagara Falls, where I've met real live PHers. Meeting others who can totally relate to me has been a Godsend, and I am thankful every day that they are there for me, and I can be there for them!

Jen said...
I agree PHriends are the best..I am so lucky I found you all...I never knew you could get attached to people you never even met in person but I have...and you are one of those very special PHriends...Love & Hugs,Jen

A Journal Jar! EDITED

2008-10-24T13:24:00.000-04:00

I was browsing through a friend's journal on AOL, and realized that long ago I also had a journal on that site. It's still up there, but AOL is shutting down their journals (another reason I'm so glad I no longer pay for that dumb server!!). I also realized that I had started a blog called a Journal Jar. A journal jar is a collection of questions, one for every day of the year, and your answers to it. I was reading some of my responses, and boy, did I have some deep thoughts!!! LOL! I decided to Google journal jars, and found a few websites with very looong lists of journal jar questions. Sooooooo, as if I didn't have enough to do in my life, I decided I wanted to start a journal jar again!!! This blog will only be for journal jar questions. My other blog will be for everything else!! I'm excited about doing this, because there are questions out there that really make you think about your past, and things that may occur in the future. I hope you enjoy! And, maybe decide to join me! :) I'll start journal jar questions tomorrow!! :)

***Editor's Note!*** I found out I could transfer my AOL Journal Jar into Blogger, and so I did that last night! I've kept all 95 prior entries that I did in 2005! I'm happy about that because I really didn't want what I wrote 3 years ago to be deleted. I haven't read everything I wrote back then, but it is a bit exciting to see if my thoughts have changed on anything! Three years may not seem like a big difference, but you never know! A lot has happened during that time!!! So now my question numbers are going to be changed. I'm going to copy and paste the previous 8 questions I did to start off my new journal jar blog, and then I'll continue on from there!!
(I'm also copying and pasting some of the comments I've gotten on the other journal jar, or else I'll end up losing them!)

Nancy said...
What a great idea. Two years ago, I was given a journal jar from a friend. It was fun, but I lost interest. This might be a way to motivate me.

Jen said...
Great idea..I also saw that Monday thing on Nancy's blog and thought that was interesting..We all need to think a little more..LOl Love Ya,Jen

Question #95 - Yards

2005-09-22T22:33:00.000-04:00

Describe your yard as a child. Did you help with yard work?

I had 2 yards growing up, a front and back. I know there are some people who only had one, or none even. I had 2, and they were both used as areas to play with friends. We had a swingset in the back for years, a pool for a few years. In the winter, my dad would snowplow huge hills in the back, and we'd sled down. That was so much fun! We'd use both the front and back yards as places to play hide n seek, or capture the flag. We'd also use both yards to split up into teams, and create little skits to show off to each other. Usually the skits involved some sort of moral. They were rather interesting! The yards definitely got some use!

While I did help with yard work, I probably shouldn't have with my health. But, I did! I raked leaves, shoveled snow. I'd take forever doing it, too. I tried mowing the lawn once when I was a teen, but lasted only 2 turns before I felt so tired I thought I was gonna die. So, I've never mowed a lawn again! lol I also do not shovel, nor do I rake. It's a good thing I have landlords!

Question #94 - Advice

2005-09-16T13:06:00.000-04:00

What is your advice to those younger than yourself?

When I hear of kids younger than me, like late teens or early 20s, wanting to get married right away, I have to say don't do it until you're at least 25. When teens turn into young adults, they don't know who they are, it takes a while to discover that. I am glad I've had time to realize who I am as a person, and to not settle with someone just because I felt like getting married. I also would tell them to not get married just because they got pregnant. It's not always the "right thing to do." I had a friend who did that, and the marriage is terrible. Their child is starting to react to the tension in the house. Some more advice: love your family, be there for them. Family can truly help you through times of need. Be kind to people, do not be judgmental. I know this is easier said than done. But I've often been judged by people who do not know me, and it hurts. Another piece of advice: learn from your mistakes. Yes, we all make them, and it's a learning experience!

Question #93 - Wash Day

2005-09-15T12:25:00.000-04:00

Tell about a frustrating experience you have had on wash day, with the washing machine, clothes, people, etc, and tell about the outcome.

First of all, I don't have a wash day. I don't have a planned day of the week for wash, I should say. I'm a single person not working, so I don't have a ton of clothes to wash all the time. So, that being said, I don't really recall any outrageous or frustrating experiences with washing my clothes. Other than shrinking a few items of clothing that I love. lol

Question #92 - If Looks Could Kill

2005-09-13T23:06:00.000-04:00

What did you look like as a child?

I was a short skinny kid, with huge, thick glasses. Most of the time, I had really long hair. Today, I am about the same. Still short, still skinny, still have long hair (except now it's red). I got contacts years ago, so at least I don't have the glasses anymore! lol

Question #91 - Traits

2005-09-13T23:01:00.000-04:00

What were your mother's best traits, and which do you share with her?

Hmmm. I'm finding this question hard for some reason. While my mom could sometimes be hard with us, I look back knowing she had good reason to be. While she seemed very strict with her rules and making us have chores around the house, I realize that it disciplined us, and got us "ready" to take responsibility for things when were older. I know there are a lot of things that I do as an adult that I also used to do when I was growing up. And there are some that I don't. lol My mom definitely showed us we were loved, no matter what we did. And I like to think that I show it to her, too, and to anyone I come to know and love.

Question #90 - Father

2005-09-10T13:57:00.000-04:00

What special things did you do with your father?

I didn't answer this one right away, because I didn't know exactly what to put. I love my father immensely. But I don't really recall him taking us out on little trips, or anything like that. I know one thing I used to love was going to his workshop, and watching him work on cars. He would talk about what he was doing, but sadly, not a lot stuck with me. lol I also remember spending time with him listening to music in the living room. My love for Simon & Garfunkel started when I was little, because he would play his records and sing along. I also remember the songs he used to sing to us when we were little. Oh yes, he also sat with us when The Muppet Show and Fraggle Rock were on. He loved those shows as much as we did! Nowadays, my father and I spend time with each other just hanging out and talking. Usually about his aches and pains, or something my mother did, or my experiences with my cat, but it's time spent with him. And there are still times when he sings the songs I know and love. And I know that counts for a lot.

Question #89 - School

2005-09-07T14:02:00.000-04:00

Describe a typical school day in junior high school.

I went to Catholic school all my life, and my junior high school was in the elementary building. In fact, all the grades were on one floor, the junior high classrooms all the way at the end of the hall. The big change we had to get used to was switching classrooms for some of our classes. I guess it was to get us used to what it would be like in high school. There's not really much to say about going to junior high. We had harder classes from the year before, and the same teachers as the year before. We also were the same class, many of the students in my class were ones I had been going to school with since pre-K. So I already knew them, the ones I didn't like, the ones who were my friends, etc. I would have to say, my class always knew how to get ourselves in trouble. And there were many pranks pulled by a lot of us...mostly the guys, and some of the girls. It was always interesting, and entertaining! Some of the highlights I remember quite well:

~ Our 7th grade teacher was brand new, and used to sweat profusely under his arms. So some of the guys would bring Right Guard to class, and spray it in the ceiling fan when the teacher had his back turned. They would also have a radio playing in the back coat room, and tell the teacher it was coming from outside when he asked about it. And he believed it. *shaking head*

~ Sometimes, when there was a funeral in the church, we couldn't eat in the cafeteria since it would be noisy down there, and a lot of times the people at the funeral would go down there for refreshments. So that meant we'd have to eat in our classroom. One time, there were a few guys near the window looking out in the alley. Several minutes later, our one teacher (a nun) came storming upstairs, claiming the boys were shouting outside the window to a woman in the alley. When we asked what they were saying, the nun said, "How does mother f***er sound to you???" I think we all dropped our jaw! Needless to say, we all had to stay away from windows whenever we ate up in the classrooms. (by the way, the lady in the alley was a person who was known for causing trouble...I know for sure the guys didn't yell out the window!!)

~Another memory was when we were able to watch movies the last week of school when we were in 8th grade. Someone brought in National Lampoon's European Vacation. Now, there is a certain scene in it when a girl opens her shirt and you see everything. When that scene showed up, our teacher (again, the nun!) went up and shut the movie off. She was furious! Somehow we got to finish watching the movie though! LOL

Question #88 - Christmas

2005-09-07T13:48:00.000-04:00

Tell about your own Christmas traditions.

When we were little, we'd all get up so early, that my mom wouldn't let us open gifts until my dad was up. So we'd usually eat breakfast first, and then we would open our stocking gifts. When everyone was ready, then we would open our gifts from Santa. We would also go to mass on Christmas, usually the children's mass. As we got older, we started going to Christmas Eve mass, and then we would open up our gifts to each other when we got home. But we would still have the same morning routine. Nowadays, since we are all in our different homes, we go to my parents' house around a certain time, and open our gifts to each other, and stocking gifts, and then any other gifts under the tree. There have been times the past few years where we don't even open anything until the afternoon! We also like trying to go to midnight mass, which at my church, is at 10pm. lol And in all the years we've celebrated Christmas, we have a nice family dinner where we get stuffed! And lately, we've been sharing stories of the past, and of what goes on in our lives. It's a wonderful time to spend together as a family. :)

Question #87 - Weddings

2005-09-01T11:37:00.000-04:00

Describe your wedding.

At first I thought, wow, this is such an easy question to answer. I've never been married, so I don't have a wedding to describe! But then I thought, maybe the question could also be to describe your wedding, even if you haven't had one yet. A lot of women have had their "ideal wedding" in their heads since they were a little girl. I never really dreamed of a wedding when I was little, but in the past few years, I've been in several weddings, and it's made me think of what I would like! So, here is what I would like my wedding to be! If it ever happens!

The bridal dresses would be a reddish color, since that is my favorite color. My dress would be very simple, yet elegant. I can't wear any of that heavy crap, so I would love a long, white, sleek dress. Nothing fancy or over the top, but yet very beautiful. Actually, over a year ago, when we were shopping for a dress for my mom, I was in the section of prom dresses, and I saw a dress that I knew instantly I'd love to wear if I ever got married. I almost bought it, but why have a dress when I don't know if it'll ever happen? Anyhow, I want an evening ceremony, outdoors, with lots of candles. Instead of the crowd throwing rice or blowing bubbles, I'd like them to light sparklers! And I'd love to have one big outdoor reception, with lots of music and dancing! Of course, in order for it to be suitable for outdoors, I'd like my wedding to be in the summer. I'd be warmer that way, too. lol I want to do betta fish for my center pieces, since I am so in love with them. Oh, and I'd like tulips as my bouquet. I think that's all I know for sure. I know there's a lot of other things to plan, but since I'm not anywhere near ready for a wedding, I can think of them later!

Question #86 - Toys

2005-08-31T00:29:00.000-04:00

Did you have a favorite toy as a child? Did it have a name? What are your memories?

I had a lot of toys growing up, many that my sisters and I shared. I think one of my favorite toys was my Barbie. I still have her, too! I also have my Todd doll, I didn't have Ken. And, I have all the clothes I accumulated for her, too. My other favorite toys that my mom still has are the original Fisher Price farm house, and the Treetop House by Mattel (I think that's who made it). I just loved playing with them! I think the farm house that is out now doesn't leave very much to the imagination! My favorite memories of toys have to be the times when my sisters and I played house with our kitchen set-up in the basement. We had pots and pans, and real dry beans and macaroni that our mom got for us. It was a lot of fun! I also remember the times when the beans got spilled, what a mess to clean up! lol

Question #85 - Authors

2005-08-29T13:48:00.000-04:00

Do you have a favorite author? Who, and why? Tell about a favorite book as a child, youth, adult.

This is a nice question, considering I love reading!! I read a lot of books, with a wide variety of themes and story lines. I'd have to say my favorite author is John Grisham. I have all of his books! I just like reading books that have to do with law, and the court system. I guess that's why I also love Law & Order so much. lol I also love J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter has got to be one of the best series I have read in a long, long time! It is so well written, and so imaginative!

When I was a really little kid, I used to love the Richard Scarry books. Lowly the Worm was my favorite character. My absolute most favorite book that I read when I was a young adult was Island of the Blue Dolphins, by Scott O'Dell. I love that book even now. I think it was one of the first books I read, where I could picture everything, and felt like I was on that island with the main character. As for my favorite book as an adult, I don't really have one. I read so many books, sometimes they seem to all blend in together! lol

Question #84 - Life Lessons

2005-08-27T18:35:00.000-04:00

What is the greatest lesson in your life you find to be true?

There have been many lessons in life that I have learned, especially being a person with a major disability....a disability that cannot be seen just by looking at me. So I'd have to say that the biggest lesson I've learned is not to judge a book by it's cover. It sounds to cliche, but it's so very true. So many people judge others without even knowing someone. And I am no angel, I've done it many times myself. I jump to conclusions about a person just by what they are wearing, or how they are acting. And it really is very unfair. I have had many people yell at me when I park in the handicap spots at the stores or restaurants. There are times when I don't wear my oxygen, and when I don't, you'd have no clue that I had a heart/lung disease. These people are rude enough to embarass me in public, when they have no idea why I'm even parking there. Even when I try to explain it, some of them still threaten to call the police. I just tell them to go ahead. I now have cards with me that explains my disease, and I just hand it to someone who asks about my oxygen, or who berrades me in a parking lot. So, I definitely have to say that judging people is one lesson I have found to be very true. Unfortunately, it's not something that is easily changed.

Question #83 - Birth Order

2005-08-25T00:18:00.000-04:00

How did you like being the oldest, youngest or middle child? Did it have a particular advantage or disadvantage?

I am the oldest of 4 girls. I guess in a lot of ways, I always had to be the responsible one, the one who was an example for my sisters. And while I do admit that I am responsible about a lot of things I do, I never wanted to feel that I had to be the one who my parents used as an example to talk to my sisters. It didn't happen often. But there have been many time where I haven't been responsible, and then I feel so guilty about it. That I'm supposed to be "perfect" in some way. All this being said, I don't consider it a disadvantage of being the oldest. Sometimes I don't feel like I'm the oldest. I guess it's the way we all behave and act with each other. Sometimes when we are together, it's like we're kids again! I love my sisters with all my heart!

Question #82 - Christmas

2005-08-11T16:29:00.000-04:00

Describe the downtown area of your hometown at Christmas.

I am still living in my hometown, and unfortunately, they do not do Christmas like they used to when I was a little girl. They used to have a Festival of Lights downtown, and it was so neat to go down and walk around and see the different displays. There was a wonderful atmosphere, and it seemed like everyone seemed so friendly. Of course, I was very little back then, so I guess it was just a child's perspective. I do miss the Festival of Lights, though. It was always a nice "date" thing to do around the holidays.

Question #81 - Spring

2005-08-10T22:39:00.000-04:00

Describe the perfect spring day, and activities done on that day.

The perfect spring day would be to take a walk in the neighborhood to admire all the new life coming up and starting to grow. I would love to walk around and see all the tulips I could see, since that is my favorite flower. I'd also love to watch the birds that come back in the area when spring begins again. Watching life grow again after a long winter is definitely a welcoming sign to me!

Question #80 - Favorites

2005-08-10T00:13:00.000-04:00

Tell about a favorite aunt.

I think this question would be a lot easier if I had to tell about a least favorite aunt. LOL Seriously, I do respect all of my aunts, and I have a LOT of them! I have 9 aunts, 8 of them on my mom's side of the family! I like all of my aunts for all different reasons. If I had to pick one, I'd say it would be Ann. But that isn't very fair, because I like all of them!! They are all wonderful women, funny as heck, caring, nurturing, and even some are kinda kooky. But that's ok, every family has someone (or even more than one someone) who is a little strange!

Question #79 - Peace

2005-08-08T23:52:00.000-04:00

What brings you the most peace, and why?

I think I always felt peaceful when I was little and going to my Grandma's creek. Seeing that much water flowing at a close-up range made me feel calm. Nowadays, I find peace when I listen to music. No matter what I listen to, it gets me in a good mood. I also find peace in prayer, and talking with God. I find peace also in my new little niece, Hailey. I love her so much, and I just beam when I'm around her.

Question 78 - Family Time

2005-07-30T16:39:00.000-04:00

What was your favorite thing to do with your family when you were young?

I used to enjoy the nights we would sit down and watch some tv together. Shows like The Muppet Show and Fraggle Rock were always favorites! I also liked when we'd go on picnics in the summer, and find a place to swim.

Question #77

2005-07-28T00:47:00.000-04:00

What personality traits do you admire the most?

I admire people who are kind and caring, nonjudgmental, and honest. People who just can't come out and say something, even if it might hurt someone's feelings, drive me nuts. Of course, I shouldn't talk, I've often done just that.

Question #76 - Sing Out Loud!

2005-07-22T18:40:00.000-04:00

Tell the words of a song from childhood, and describe any memories it holds for you.

You Are My Sunshine

You are my sunshine,

My only sunshine.

You make me happy,

When skies are gray.

You never know, dear,

How much I love you.

Please don't take my sunshine away.

This is one of the many songs that reminds me of being little, and of my dad. He used to sing this to all of us, and it just reminds me of being happy and innocent. Now he gets to sing that song to his new granddaughter! I know she'll love it as much as we did.

Question #75 - Oh, Christmas Tree, Oh, Christmas Tree

2005-07-20T22:51:00.000-04:00

Describe getting a Christmas tree with your family. How did you decorate it? When did you put it up?

Our family tree was the same tree every single year. Since my dad is allergic to pine, we had a fake tree. Which was fine with me, since I hate the smell of pine! I have my own fake tree now! lol Anyway, it varied year to year when we would put the tree up, but usually it was weeks before Christmas. When we were really little, I remember putting decorations that we'd make in grade school on the tree. Some of them, I still have today, and they go on my tree now. As we got older, my mom would buy us ornaments as gifts, and we'd save those to put up for the next year. Sometimes my mom would make popcorn for us to string up, although a lot of times we'd end up eating most of it. lol

Since the subject is Christmas trees, one distinct memory I have of our tree is the year when my youngest sister was maybe 4 or 5. My mom wanted me to keep an eye on her around the tree while she was doing something (I think giving another sister a bath). My sister was very close to the tree, and she was trying to yank something off. When I pulled her back, the tree came toppling down on both of us! No one really got in trouble, but I really tried to make sure it didn't happen again!! lol

Question #74 - Ages

2005-07-20T15:08:00.000-04:00

What has been your favorite age so far, and why?

I look at little kids every day, and I think to myself, "oh to be a kid again!" I would love to go back to my early years of childhood. What is more magical than being a kid? My sisters and I created many games to play, we all had such imaginations. We had fun playing with the neighborhood kids, too. The Big Wheels they had back then were much better than the ones today, and so were a lot of other toys and things we used to play with. I just miss the innocence of being a child. Not worrying about anything major at that age. This is not saying that I hate being an adult! It was just so much easier back then!

Question #73 - School Days

2005-07-19T22:01:00.000-04:00

Describe a typical day in high school.

Hmmm, high school. Not exactly a time I'd like to constantly reminisce about. However, a typical day started out before homeroom, when everyone would ask me for homework for some sort of class. Especially chemistry. I never took chemistry. lol I enjoyed most of my classes during the day, and lunch with my friends. But there were many, many, MANY times that I felt like I didn't belong. I was the shy type, the one who was the nice girl, but not nice enough to feel popular by most of the people in my class. I actually hated high school because of that. When I left high school, I became a different person...slowly. I realized that I could open up more, and be myself, and not who I thought others wanted me to be. So even today, I know I'm a lot different than I was in high school! And I definitely don't miss it, either!

Question #72 - Wedding Bells

2005-07-15T16:05:00.000-04:00

Describe your wedding. Who was in it? What did everyone wear?

What an easy question for me to answer. I have yet to be married, or even engaged, so I can't answer it! lol

Question #71 - Vacations

2005-07-14T00:03:00.000-04:00

Where do you like to vacation, and why?

It's been a while since I've actually been on a vacation. And the place we used to vacation most was my grandma's. However, I would love to vacation on a nice beach, Hawaii would be great! I'll never have the money to go there, so I can only dream. lol I don't always travel well, I find it hard for me to handle once in awhile. I have to carry around oxygen and stuff, it gets to be a little too much sometimes.

Question #70 - Bicycle, Bicycle!

2005-07-07T14:45:00.000-04:00

Did you have a bicycle, and if so, what was it like? Tell about riding it. Where did you go?

I had a bike when I was about 11 or 12. It took me a while to get used to riding it, since I actually had a fear of trying to balance it. But once I got the hang of it, I would ride up and down our street, and in the alley. When I was 13, I think, I was riding it down to the corner (right across the street from where I live now), and when I made the left turn around the corner, I lost my balance and hit the tree. I fell off the bike and when I tried to get back up, I couldn't stand on my right foot. I had sprained my ankle! I had no idea how I was going to get home, until I saw my mom walking down the street to go to our school to work bingo. She went back and got my dad, and from then on, I never rode a bike again!

Question #69

2005-07-07T00:39:00.000-04:00

Do you like to go to the symphony, the opera, or the theater? What have you seen and enjoyed the most as far as productions go?

I have seen a symphony in our area play a couple summers ago when they played Led Zeppelin music. It was awesome!! I have seen a few plays in the theaters, Mamma Mia being one of the better ones I've seen. But my most favorite play/opera is The Phantom of the Opera. I have seen it 5 times, 4 times at the Pantages Theater in Toronto. I absolutely love it, and I still cry every time I hear the music. I haven't seen the film version yet, but maybe one of these days! I was afraid I might not like it, but I'll have to just go ahead and rent it some day!

Question #68 - Dad

2005-06-30T18:08:00.000-04:00

Did you and your father share any interests? Tell about your relationship with him.

It wasn't until I was a teen when I discovered my love for hockey, and that my father used to play when he was younger. That is one thing that we have shared together, love for the Detroit Redwings! We also love Simon & Garfunkel, and actually went to their concert last June when they came to town. I will never forget that! I have always had great love for my father, as much as he has loved all 4 of his girls. I still do. I make it sound like he is no longer with us, but that's not so. I just feel like I don't see him as much as I used to.

Question #67 - Holidays

2005-06-28T20:17:00.000-04:00

What is your favorite holiday, and how do you celebrate it?

I love Thanksgiving! Getting together with the family is great, and eating tons of yummy food is just icing on the cake! We all like to make something for dinner, and I usually make a pecan pie. I could eat a whole one myself, but talk about your high cholesterol! LOL Since I have no significant other, I usually just go down to my parents' house for most of the day, to spend time with them and my sisters.

Question #66 - College

2005-06-27T13:09:00.000-04:00

Did you go to any college or technical training? If so, where? What did you study?

I went to a 4 year college after high school, at Niagara University. I studied to become an elementary teacher. After graduating with my BA, I tutored for a couple months, worked at a daycare for 2 months, and then started working for Headstart as a preschool teacher. While at Headstart, I went back to the University at Buffalo for my masters degree in early childhood education. Even though I had to quit my job for health reasons, and will most likely never teach again, I finished my masters degree. I have 2 degrees that I am very proud of, because I put a lot of hard work into a field I love: teaching.

Question #65 - The Teenage Years

2005-06-25T16:01:00.000-04:00

What do you remember most about being a teenager?

I had good and bad moments of being a teen. I never was a rebellious person, and that never changed when I reached the teen years. But I do always remember not feeling accepted by a lot of the people in my class. High school was hard for me many times. I had my close group of friends, but I also always wondered what was wrong with me to not be accepted into the "clique." Of course, things have changed dramatically since high school. I realized nothing was wrong with me, that my classmates just chose not to see me for the person I was. I opened up a lot since then, and I'm definitely glad to be out of my teenage years!

Question #64 - Back to Childhood

2005-06-25T15:55:00.000-04:00

What was your favorite Sunday activity as a child?

Well, we always went to church on Sundays. Not always my favorite, but it was something we did as a family, and we don't do that now. And that's not really anyone's fault, we just all don't go to church. But I digress. I think one of my fav activities on Sundays was going to my grandpa's house for dinner. We went quite often, and I miss it. My grandpa almost always had meatloaf and mashed potatoes. It's just fun to reminisce now about the times we used to spend there, but I know I appreciated those times even as a child.

Question #63 - Doctors

2005-06-25T15:49:00.000-04:00

How do you feel about doctors, and why?

Well, I pretty much like doctors. That is easily said because I have been going to doctors all my life, being that I have a heart and lung condition that I was born with. I've had regular doctors, cardiologists, and a variety of others in between. Most of them, I have liked. The doctors I have currently are wonderful, and very personable. They answer the questions I have, and they are genuinely concerned for my health. And I appreciate that since things won't ever change with my need for doctors!

Question #62 - Grandparents

2005-06-25T15:45:00.000-04:00

What did your grandfathers do for a living? Did your grandmothers work?

I don't recall being told that either of my grandmothers worked. My grandma on my mom's side had 11 children, so I KNOW she took care of them over the years! My other grandmother did a lot of things at home, but I don't think she had a regular job.

My grandfather on my mom's side did work, but I can't for the life of me remember what he did at this moment. My dad's father worked a bunch of different jobs, including running a gas station, and working at Carborundum.

Question #61 - Life After...

2005-06-09T16:07:00.000-04:00

How do you feel about death? What is your philosophy of "the afterlife?"

I don't really fear death, because I know that there is a much better place I'd be going when I die. I think I fear the most how I'd die. I hope that I just go in my sleep, with no pain. But of course, that's not for me to decide. As for the afterlife, if there is one, I'm not sure. I believe we go to heaven or hell, depending on what kind of life we lead. I'm not sure there is life after death, or reincarnation. Maybe I'll find out when it's my time to go. lol

Question #60 - Childhood Vacations

2005-06-06T11:25:00.000-04:00

Tell about a favorite childhood vacation.

We didn't take many vacations when I was growing up. Trips to my grandma's house three hours away were considered vacations, but they also became habit. I think the place I remember most when I was little was Wasaga Beach in Canada. My parents would rent a cabin for a week, and I remember playing down at the beach. We really were quite little then! I think I was like 7 or 8. My dad's friend's family would come down too, sometimes. I vaguely remembering one of his kids trying to dig a hole way down in the sand. He got it so deep, that he was able to just stand right up in it. So I'd have to say that is my favorite memory, because we were just little kids. And I miss my childhood days.

Question #59 - Open Wide!

2005-06-03T14:20:00.000-04:00

How do you feel about dentists?

I have always felt tense going to the dentist, even when I was a little kid. I got through childhood with no cavities, AMAZINGLY. Several years back, I tried a new dentist, and the people there told me I had 4 cavities. Like out of the blue. I had them filled, but then I heard horror stories about this place from other people, and knew that I probably had only one cavity at that time. So, I didn't go to the dentist for like 2 years. When I finally got up the nerve to try a new place, I ended up liking the people there. So, I go to the dentist twice a year. I still get nervous, but I haven't had any major problems! I guess I'll keep going since one of my biggest fears is having problems with my teeth.

Question #58

2005-06-02T14:32:00.000-04:00

What convinced you the most in your choice of a spouse (significant other)?

Well, I honestly can't answer this question. I'm not married, and I currently don't have a significant other. This question was easy. lol

Question #57 - Lessons Learned

2005-06-01T14:35:00.000-04:00

What was the hardest thing for you to learn in life?

I think the hardest thing I've always had to learn is that I could not do a lot of what "normal" people could do. And that is still true today. Because of my heart and lung disease, I could never run around as much as the kids I went to school with. I couldn't go on a lot of rides at amusement parks. I couldn't learn to swim. There are still things today that I have a hard time doing, like taking longs walks, or doing things like vacuuming. There have been many times when I've pushed my limits anyway, and I usually regret it afterward because I end up feeling so lousy. So I've learned to deal with the fact that I'm not "normal" physically, but I certainly am normal mentally, and there a lot of things I can do!

Question #56 - Then and Now

2005-05-31T12:44:00.000-04:00

What things do you enjoy doing as an adult that you also enjoyed as a child?

I loved reading as a child, and I still love reading as an adult. I also love watching shows I used to enjoy when I was little, like Sesame Street or The Muppets. I know that soon enough, I'll be doing things like coloring and playing with dolls when my little niece is old enough! I used to like making crafts when I was little, and I still do that today with jewelry.

Question #55 - Anger

2005-05-22T16:39:00.000-04:00

What is the angriest you have ever been, and how have you resolved it?

Hmmm, this is a toughy. I am not an angry person, and very rarely do people see me get very angry. I would have to say, the angriest I have been was when I found out my ex-best friend did something behind my back that I thought was so unfair and unkind. I grew up with this person, she was my best friend for over 20 years. But there was always something about her that a lot of people didn't like. She was always about herself. Before she broke my trust, we hadn't been talking as much as usual, and when we did, it was almost like she had nothing to say. So when she did what she did, it was the last straw. I decided not to talk to her for a while. That ended up being almost a year, before she sent me a letter. We hung out for a little bit, but things just never were the same. I haven't talked to her in over a year now. And honestly, I don't really miss her. Sad to say.

Question #54 - Wonderful Things

2005-05-21T23:19:00.000-04:00

What is the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to you?

Hmmm, this is a tough question! My life has been pretty tough healthwise, so I didn't always have opportunities to have wondrous things happen. I would have to say that SO FAR, the most wonderful thing that has happened was being asked to be a godmother to my best friend's son. I never expected to be asked, and I was quite honored. :)

Question #53 - TV

2005-05-19T18:44:00.000-04:00

What was your favorite TV show as a child? What is it now?

My sisters and I watched a lot of different shows growing up. I didn't really have one favorite though. I know that we loved watching The Muppet Show and Fraggle Rock. Those were shows that even my parents' enjoyed watching with us!

Now, I'm addicted to a lot of shows. Nothing changes. lol My favorite would have to be any of the Law & Order shows. SVU Is the best, in my opinion.

Question #52 - Baptism

2005-05-19T00:40:00.000-04:00

What do you remember about the day you were baptized?

I don't remember the day that I was baptized. I was only a few months old! If I actually remembered it, I'd be one darn smart person!! lol

Question #51 - Siblings

2005-05-14T16:33:00.000-04:00

Did you get along with all of your brothers and sisters? Did you wish you had more of them, or less?

I grew up with three younger sisters, and I wouldn't change it for the world. I love them all dearly, even during the times when we didn't always get along! We created crazy games together when we were little, which were fun to play on days when we couldn't go outside. My sisters are still so very dear to me today, and I don't know what I'd do without them!

I am glad it was just the 4 of us growing up. My parents aren't exactly rich, and although they provided us with a lot, I can't imagine if there were any more kids in the family!

Question #50 - Courtship

2005-05-12T12:26:00.000-04:00

Tell a courtship story about your parents. How did they meet?

My parents met when my mom was living in Rochester, NY, with a roommate. One night, her roommate's boyfriend and his friend (my dad), came up for a visit. I guess that's when things started! I'm not even sure how long they dated before they got married. Their anniversary is next week, on the 18th. They'll be married for 31 years!

Question #49 - Win or Lose

2005-05-12T12:21:00.000-04:00

How do you feel about winning? Losing?

Well honestly, who likes to lose? No one, but it's how you deal with it that makes someone a poor loser or a gracious one. I love winning, but I don't win very often. In fact, rarely. If I do win something, I'm very excited! But since I lose often, I just say oh well, congrats to who one, no big deal!

Question #48 - Adventure

2005-05-12T12:18:00.000-04:00

What is the most adventuresome thing you've ever done?

Hmm, this is a tough question, because a lot of what I do, I have to think about my health. So I'm not one to just go do something on a whim. However, I think of of my most favorite adventures was a road trip to Bethlehem, PA with my sister and two of our friends to visit one of my other sisters. She was living there at the time while she was going to grad school. We drove down for a weekend, so a huge group of us could go to Philly to this warehouse club. I can't think of the name of it right now, but it was featured a couple times on The Real World: Philadelpha. This club had like 4 or 5 different bars inside, all playing a different music. And, it was gay night at the club! Oh my, was it interesting! We all got dressed up...funky outfits, outrageous hair, and I even had a feather boa. Some girl came up to me and wanted it when we were there. I told her no! Anyway, it was a long night full of dancing and drinking, and it was just a fun time! My favorite quote of the night from my sister: "All of these hot guys, and none of them want to look at me!" LOL

Question #47 - Animal In You

2005-05-07T15:44:00.000-04:00

If you could be any animal, which one would you be and why?

Ok, this question is sooooo ironic to me right at this moment! I was just cleaning all of my betta fish containers (I have 6, I would NOT recommend getting that many because you have to clean 6 individual containers....can't those fish just get along??), and I was thinking that if I ever had another life, I would love to be a beautiful fish in the ocean. I am so fascinated with ocean life! I would love it mostly because, I do not know how to swim, nor will I ever know because of my health problems. I think it would be so wonderful to be a fish in the ocean and be able to swim all over the place! Yep, that's what I would be!

Question #46 - Reading

2005-05-06T23:34:00.000-04:00

Do you have a favorite magazine? What do you learn from it? Why do you like it?

I haven't read a magazine in quite a while, actually. I like Cosmo occasionally, and some of the entertainment magazines, like People. But I think if I had to pick a favorite, it would be Mailbox, which is a magazine for teachers. They always had some great ideas! When I had a classroom, I was always looking for something new and different. Teachers often were able to submit ideas, so I borrowed them, or used them as a springboard to create my own thing. Actually, and magazines that have to do with teaching, or child development, fascinate me!

Question #45 - Funerals

2005-05-05T17:28:00.000-04:00

Tell about a funeral you attended that you will never forget.

I honestly haven't been to too many funerals. I've been to a lot of wakes, and those are always hard. Even if a close friend has someone pass away, I never know what words to say to feel helpful to them besides I'm sorry for your loss. There is one funeral that I attended that I can't seem to forget. A friend that I had gone to grade school with lost her father several years ago. A bunch of friends and I from grade school went to the funeral, and wondered if our friend would be there. You see, this friend had been sick ever since were in 7th grade. She slowly had been deteriorating over the years, to the point where she couldn't even speak. She ended up being put in a health care facility when it became too hard for her parents to care for her. Anyhow, toward the end of the ceremony, we heard her cries in the back of the church. We saw her nurse with her, and she was in her wheelchair. I started sobbing right then and there. I felt so awful for her, that she could not verbally express how she was feeling, or even fully cry. Her father was a wonderful man, worked hard for his family. But I remember his funeral because of the anguish of his daughter.

Sadly, this friend died last year. She didn't have a funeral, just a memorial service, because she donated her body to science. I will never forget her, and am so terribly sorry that I didn't see her for the last year of her life. But that is another story....

Question #44 - Inventions

2005-05-04T15:30:00.000-04:00

What is one invention you could not live without?

Wow, if this isn't a tough question, I don't know what is!! lol I honestly was going to say my computer, at first. However, I got along for a LONG time without one. There are other ways to communicate and find things if I had to. So after thinking about it for a bit longer, the thing I couldn't live without is my radio/CD player. I absolutely love music. Half the time I do things with some sort of music playing in the background. It grounds me, so to speak. It has always helped me when I was down, and it's always been there when I've felt like dancing. I definitely would be lost without it because, let's face it, I just can't sing. I may try, I may be out of tune, but I usually have the music on to back me up. Or cover me up, should I say. lol So, that would be the invention I can't live without, my radio/CD player.

Question #43 - Childhood Slaves

2005-05-01T20:41:00.000-04:00

Where you ever responsible for any chores? What were they?

Saturday was the day that my sisters and I had to do our chores before we could go out and play with our friends. Quite often, our chores were rotated every few months, so we wouldn't get bored doing the same thing every Saturday. My chores often involved dusting everything, or cleaning the bathroom. I think it's the reason I really hate those chores today. lol I never really got to do the vacuuming, because it made me too tired. Same thing today, but I do try and do it anyway, just slowly. We also had to take turns doing the dishes every night. There were plenty of fights over whose turn it was, and who was going to wash and dry. We never got allowances for any of these chores, and my mom's reasoning was that we lived in the house, and needed to learn how to take care of things to keep it nice. I tend to agree with that. I still hate chores, though. lol

Question #42 - Family

2005-04-28T11:34:00.000-04:00

Tell about family reunions.

We've had only one very large family reunion on my mom's side of the family, and that was in 2000 (I think). It was the largest amount of people I had seen in years, and I couldn't believe I was related to all of them. lol Some I had never even met before, and if I saw them again today, I'd still have no clue as to who they are. It was a great day though, the weather was perfect and everyone seemed to be having a good time. Lots of pictures were taken! I saw cousins I hadn't seen in years, so it was really nice. Now, on my dad's side of the family, there are only about 10 people, so it's like a gathering when we do get together. lol We last saw them at my sister's wedding this past June, but that certainly wasn't a time to sit and catch up. We need to make plans to do that soon!!!

Question #41

2005-04-26T12:10:00.000-04:00

What is your favorite scripture, and why? OR What is your favorite inspirational saying, and why?

Very interesting question today. And I'm not really sure how to answer it. I don't really have a favorite. I don't study the Bible, so I don't know the scriptures by heart. I'm sure if I gave this question more thought, I could come up with something. But right now, I can't really answer it! :-/

Question #40 - Let's Eat!

2005-04-25T14:58:00.000-04:00

Where do you eat out, and what do you order?

I have a bunch of different places I like to eat. I don't eat out as often as I used to, since I don't have the money. But on the occasion that I do, I love Olive Garden. Anything pasta is good with me, but I usually end up getting shrimp alfredo. They have their pasta bowl special on right now, I wish I could go!! lol I also love Red Lobster. Their food is great, but my fav is their vanilla bean cheesecake. It's the best darn cheesecake I've ever had!! I also like going for a cheap, but very good meal, and there are a couple places around here to choose from to do just that. Yianni's happens to be one of my favs. I usually go for their ham & cheese, and one of their soups. So all in all, I love to go out to eat, and I do like trying new things!

Question #39 - Going to the Movies

2005-04-22T11:51:00.000-04:00

What do you think about movies, and why?

I just love going to movies! My favorites are comedies, romance, romantic comedies, animated, thriller/horror, some foreign films, and sometimes action films. I'm not that big on them, nor am I really big on sci-fi stuff. I do like the movies that involve some sort of killer animal or bug, even if they are stupid! lol I tend to watch movies more in the theater or on tv, than on video or DVD. I have a ton of movies, but I never seem to watch any of them. I do love going to the theater with my friends, it's something we try to do at least once a month. My biggest beef with movies, though, are the dumb ticket prices!! I can't stand paying almost $9 for a movie (although that price may be cheap compared to other areas), and I usually end up getting cheaper tickets through my credit union. If anyone lives near a Wegmans, they sell them cheaper, too. lol And I agree with Promise, the movie popcorn is the best reason to go!! lol

Question #38 - Happy Birthday!

2005-04-20T13:37:00.000-04:00

Tell about any of your family traditions for birthdays.

We didn't really have any special things for our birthdays growing up. We celebrated the person's birthday on that day. Sometimes we had parties, but the older we got, the less they happened. I think my last birthday party was when I turned 13, and I had a sleepover. My mom never had a sleepover again. We didn't do anything horrible, of course, that's my opinion and not hers. lol Nowadays, it seems the big things we usually do is go out to dinner somewhere with friends and family. I love doing that! Last year for my birthday, 15 of us went to dinner at Red Lobster. It's just a good time!

Question #37 - Sniff, Sniff

2005-04-19T22:18:00.000-04:00

What are your favorite smells?

I love any fruity candle or lotion smells. I love the smell of laundry fresh out of the dryer. I love the smell of baked goods! I love the smell of coffee, except that I can't stand the taste. lol I love the smell of wood burning from a fireplace. And I love the smell of the Falls when I go down there during the summer to watch the fireworks.